30 For behold, thus saith the Lord God: I will give unto the children of men line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little and there a little; and blessed are those who hearken unto my precepts, and lend an ear unto my counsel, for they shall learn wisdom; for unto him that receiveth I will give more; and from them that shall say, We have enough, from them shall be taken away even that which they have
There have been layers in my membership. In the beginning I was taught doctrine, principle, language, culture and how the Holy Ghost feels. A few years passed and I learned how to be exact with callings, tithing settlement, responsibilities and service. A couple more years passed and I entered the Lords house. The largest of all my choices in the church so far. And now, as 10 years has arrived, I'm still advancing spiritually but am reminded of just how young my spiritual mind is. This month I'm learning how to love my ward family. To not just love specific members, but to love all that belong to our ward boundaries and serve them well.
It's said that a human will learn the most he or she ever learns between the ages of 3 and 8 and this may be true from a scientific, biological standpoint but from a spiritual standpoint (which I feel is greater then biological) I really feel like the most I've ever learned is in these last 10 years. Ironically enough, What I was taught during my primitive years wasn't very healthy for a child and I learned many things that have needed to be corrected as an adult. And the only way that correction has been feasible is through my membership inside the church. The only way to repair the past has been through The Book of Mormon and Jesus Christ's atonement for mankind.
As I've been healing from my childhood, there's been lots of questions in the last year as to how The Atonement can heal me, Many times, I have felt despair. I've felt frustrated, so lost and feeling like I just would never heal. It seemed like change wasn't something I could do. It wasn't until I fully surrendered my problems and let God take control of all the confusion did I start to see miracles happen and things change in my life. Something new I started doing is this. When I'm scared and fearful I tell him, "Dear God, I'm so scared, and it hurts, and I don't want to be the way I have been. I can't control this because it's bigger than me. Can you please make me strong and able to get through this and I will stop being scared and know that you are aware of me and in control". From this moment on, I stop worrying as much as I can and only think about the positive things God can do. I repeat his goodness in my head and don't let the fear arise.
This week I had a situation where I knew I couldn't handle what had happen to me. The offense that was brought into my head made me sick and immediately made me feel aloof and paralyzed. I prayed and was influenced to not act on my feelings but rather act with love and continue to not let my feeling be me but to be a new Kristina. I followed through for an hour even though it was discomfiting and felt like the pain might be written on my face. I kept smiling and acting with compliments and ended up changing what could've been a bad situation into a great one. This was the first time since the age of 6 I had ever done such. It blew my mind. I felt like I broke free from chains that have always held me under. As simple as this example is, it shows me, that line upon line, precept upon precept, God can change me and help me be a new Kristina. I can see that for every situation now that may cause me fear, I can remember this miracle and use it as a reference as I evolve.
God will always fix what we cannot but I believe you must also be willing to try all you can. This life's journey is a test and part of passing that test is looking for Christ to help fix the broken pieces, His life was a sacrifice for all of Mankind. I testify that Jesus lives and we have a father in heaven who loves us so much he has shown us the way to return to him and his son. I say these thing in the beloved sons name, Jesus Christ- Amen
No comments:
Post a Comment